Giving it a shot

 

I know I said Insecure Writer's Support Group hasn't been working for me, but maybe that was more an issue of where things were during the pandemic. I guess I'm starting to slowly come to the understanding that even though there will be before times and all that, the news that Texas has just decided it's done with virus protections and is going to open up everything is an indication that everyone is just going to march back to normal ASAP. 

I have honestly never felt so thoroughly gaslit in my life. Like we're just supposed to go back to work and our office buildings and pretend this last year never happened? All that was just some fever dream and please move on? 

*sigh* This is probably why I had to drop posting last year because it seems insensitive to be yelling "Bullshit" at the top of my lungs while people are dying, but here we are. This is some impressive bullshit timeline we are all living through. 

I know a lot of people have had a hard time writing. I did. Or rather, I thought I did at first. If I compare the last year's writing, it's pretty close to on par with any other year, but the year seemed like it was ten years long, so my productivity feels like it was about ten times less. Not the case. 

I have definitely struggled to bring myself to the place where the words come, but it's still there, I just have to drag myself there. And while that is definitely less than ideal, it's not that bad either. I have always had to drag myself to the place where the words come, it's never been super easy. Or rather, it's never been super easy if I'm trying to produce words without having gone through the buildup before hand, the daydreaming, the notes, the world building, the what ifs and the playing it out like a movie in my head. 

All this to say, I couldn't handle a lot of normal things over the last year, and I'm not alone in that. I had to go to normal work. I had to deal with the extra burden of distance learning, and cooking EVERY. LAST. MEAL. (my god, my family wants three squares every day?? Absurd, I tell you.) And now that some people are demanding the return of normal (ha! good luck), I guess I'll play along in this one area. 

This is an Insecure Writer's Support Group Post, and I don't follow rules (especially now), but check out the page and this month's cohosts,  Sarah - The Faux Fountain Pen Jacqui Murray, Chemist Ken, Victoria Marie Lees, Natalie Aguirre, and JQ Rose!